[ Thursday, August 14, 2003 ]

Blackout babies

Looks like folks will be makin’ babies tonight in northeast America and southeast Canada.

Yep, it’s blackout time again.

Sometime during the afternoon of August 14, something happened somewhere and the power went out over a couple hundred miles throughout that region. (Forgive the vagueness. This is still an ongoing event. Obviously, the blackout did not hit western Pennsylvania - PhugIt’s home territory. Or as we like to call it, The State with Electricity.)

That means people will stay home since there might not be many places open due to a lack of power. They’ll get some red wine, have a few drinks and make sweet, sweet lovin’. Or some people might get piss drunk on tequila and get to humpin’. Either way, there’s gonna be some babies shooting out of some wombs come nine months from now.
Dave Sutor [6:12 PM]

Darkness coverage

Doesn’t it seem a bit odd to interrupt network television broadcasts and dominate cable news shows with stories about a blackout from Detroit to New York City since the people most hampered by it don't have the energy to run their television sets?
Dave Sutor [6:11 PM]

Slappin’ the donkey

We can only hope Al Sharpton meant the Democratic Party.

Please God, let that be the case.

During a recent debate between Democratic Party presidential candidates in Philadelphia, Sharpton stated, “If you want to move a donkey, you have to slap the donkey. I intend, in the next eight months, to slap this donkey all the way from Iowa to the last primary. I intend to slap this donkey until it stands up for the American people. I intend to slap this donkey until this donkey kicks George Bush right out of the White House.”

Logic would conclude Sharpton intended the statement as a message of his intention to spur debate in the Democratic Party - one with a donkey as its national symbol. However, pervert innuendo could create another image from those words.

And - just as a hunch - the average PhugIt reader probably knows something about pervert innuendo. (We’ve done studies.)

From that perspective, the image of Sharpton kicking President Bush out of the White House by slapping his donkey across the country falls somewhere along the spectrum between comical and mind-bendingly disturbing.

Fortunately for Sharpton, the Democrats never adopted a monkey as their symbol or he would be in prison, since ‘slapping the monkey’ would be a more widely recognized reference to a certain act by males. At least the donkey reference kept it in the realm of where a person would need to have at least some perversion on the mind to use the alternative meaning.
Dave Sutor [2:39 AM]